39) Dreams

This picture sorta makes me imagine planting a watermelon seed and having it grow into a pecan tree. This picture grew and changed that much during the course of it's creation.

I read a poem called "Der Erlkönig". It put the image of an elf trying to lure a person away in my mind. Then sometime later I decided to draw a picture based off this poem [link] and it brought that image back to my mind. I thought, heaven is a state of mind...the place I feel the greatest peace is in my own dreams and fantasies. That's where I go to escape the troubles of this world. So, I started drawing my luring elf guide, and then added in flowers, a twirly bordering, and the fantasy stuff.
It was about that time that I had an emotional breakdown and began mentally beating myself up for having such a juvenile way of dealing with life. This continued for about 3 days until I had pretty much decided to stop drawing cause it's getting me nowhere and to stop writing. Then I finally broke down and prayed, and I felt better. As, I happily continued on with my picture (I started inking it), I couldn't help but think that this picture wasn't the thing that brought me the most peace. Fantasy isn't the outlet that brings me the most peace, it's only the second greatest, religion is the first. So I felt like a goof. Still, this is a form of heaven in my mind. So, I happily finished the picture.
I feel really different now. I absolutely love this picture (it's my new fave), but it means something different to me than it originally did. It now represents hopes and dreams for the future.

Sketched with a pencil, inked with a papermate pen, and colored with colored pencils.

Drawn: July 3, 2009
Colored: July 8, 2009